In order to boost your confidence, use the strategies we discuss like visualization, power poses and becoming aware of what is going on in your mind.
When our nerves get the best of us, our confidence takes a shot and we just can’t seem to muster up what we need to make connections we really want to make.
Approaching people who you find intriguing can be extremely intimidating.
You begin thinking about all the ways it could go wrong. The girl may reject you, the VIP may not think you’re worth his time or that coworker you pass in the hallway may not smile back. Taking that first step takes a leap of faith and confidence.
Here are some ‘guidelines’ to boost your confidence:
1|Adopt Power Poses to boost confidence
People who hold high power poses (prideful, relaxed, taking up space like putting their feet on the desk) show lower levels of cortisol and increased testosterone levels, making people feel more confident, more willing to take risks and less stressed.
High power poses consist of simple poses where you’re taking up space or feeling relaxed or victorious.
Use these poses whenever you need a confidence boost. If you don’t want to be obvious about it, simply go to the bathroom and stand like Superman (with your hands on your hips for 2 minutes). That’s it!
2| Practice Visualization to boost confidence
I know its a cliche but top athletes and performers use visualization as a way to win Olympic events and perform at peak levels.
Visualizing in vivid detail is a great way to build motivation towards doing something you may find intimidating because you activate the same sensory and motor parts of the brain that are involved with the action you’re visualizing.
This means that when you’re visualizing you’re activating the parts of the brain as if you were actually doing what you want to do.
3| Mental Double Checks to boost confidence
In order to convey confidence, you’re going to have to control what is going on in your head. What goes on in your head is directly reflected in your verbal and nonverbal cues.
Mental double checks are simply taking a moment to observe what is going on in your mind.
You may find that that inner-voice is beating yourself up over little things or causing self-doubt. Remember, the stories and narratives you tell yourself become who you are. In order to build your confidence, you have to master your story by gaining control over that inner-voice.
You may want to take a few deep breaths to get back into the moment or you may want to begin visualizing what the other person is talking about, imagining their story in your mind to feel engaged again.
The point is that in order to be “in control” of your mind it’s important to stay present. Remember staying present means being in the moment.
4| Small Talk Works
When people make first impressions, they’re largely looking for two main characteristics impressions and that is trustworthiness and confidence. But trustworthiness is the most important piece.
The mistake that most men make is that they’re so obsessed with showing power and confidence that they forget about the importance of trustworthiness.
The questions that are open-ended they’re the types of questions that rely on the other person to provide some depth rather than simply saying “yes” or “no.”
Other thing you can so is to make them the center of the conversation.
Research has shown that clothing is another key factor when it comes to making first impressions.
If you are going to a social event remember always to be presentable. You don’t have to be the best dressed guy in the room. But be the guy that makes everyone’s head turn and yes, for both sexes. Remember its better to be over-dressed than to be under-dressed.
6| Use your Eyes
One of the best ways to show trust is to use eye contact. It helps show someone that you’re present and paying attention, thus making them feel important. Don’t you hate when you’re talking to someone and they’re glancing around the room or checking their phone?
Start practicing your eye contact. If you don’t feel comfortable doing it, here are a few tips:
- Look at only one eye of the person you are talking to. If you are not comfortable looking directly to both of them.
- You can also focus on one eyebrow of the other person, Truth be told they’ll assume you’re looking in their eyes even though you aren’t
- Make eye contact a habit. Practice making eye contact for a few seconds with strangers. Make it a habit so it becomes automatic.
Remember that first impressions matter. To approach people is to make them feel comfortable and important. You can do this by using small talk, making sure you look presentable and maintaining eye contact.